The Iron(y) in Ironman

I drove 15 hours post IMCDA so I had a lot of time to reflect. Here are some ironic moments from the day:

• In the days leading up to the race, I experienced nausea due to nerves. Come race day, nothing.

• I wore white on a day that saw me piss my pants at least 6 times on the bike, a record for pissing on the bike for me.

• I was smiling all day even though I was racing to my second worst time for an ironman.

• I'm the 40 year-old with a 2:39 marathon to my credential, but it was the 55 year-old woman that went flying by me during the run telling me to hang in there.

• I spent hundreds of hours preparing for what could go wrong, but during miles 18-22 I was totally clueless and walked aimlessly (and all I had to do was eat, which I eventually figured out at mile 23).

• For something that is supposed to be fun, I sure went to some dark places with these thoughts being an all-time low: I'm not doing IM Canada; I'm going to quit blogging because I'm so embarrassed, I'm probably going to be the butt of a lot of jokes; but not once, did I think about not finishing.

• Though I fell FAR short of my goals and had a bad race, I was so happy running down that finish, and so happy post race in the athlete area talking to my teammates and friends.

• After 11+ hours of pain, I'm doing it all again in two months at IM Canada.

And now, my thank you's:

Bree Wee for sending those texts pre-race and and telling me something that made me happy post race.
John Murphy for that voicemail message, I too thought this was going to be my year. The year is not over and I do have Canada?
Charisa Wernick for your text messages pre and post race to check-in.
Matt Cusack for making my first day there one of my most memorable ironman first days, it was easy, relaxed, and fun.
Teresa Nelson and Mark Webb for inviting me to your pre-race dinner and to Mark's mom for boiling my eggs for race day.
Kim Schwabenbauer for sending me the bat phone number just in case.
Libby Bergman for taking the time to compose one of the best letters I've ever received. Regardless of my result, I really really read the letter...four times.
Michelle Simmons for using energy to advise me to spin up the hills during the second loop of the bike.
Mary Tanner for that hug right before the start of the race.
Joshua Schoenfeld, Evan Kerr, Jay Ridgeway, Mirek Boruta, and Jason Jacobs for always cheering me on when we crossed paths.
Kara Teklinski, Sandy Liaw-Myers, and Tricia Gellman for the best bike support crew and post-race support crew.
Gardi Jackson and Bert Schaeffer for being everywhere on the course.
Frank Kim for telling me to run with him...but I only lasted 400 yards?
Beth for introducing herself on the run saying that she reads my blog, and then proceeded to leave me in her dust, made me laugh.
Genevieve Priebe for that huge shout out, I was totally out of it and couldn't respond but it hit me about 5 seconds later.
Jamie Brooks and Ray Pajek for dinner convo and just generally hanging out.
And to the rest of you who sent me messages on FB and such. They say ironman is a journey and not a day, I wholeheartedly agree.

Ironman Coeur d'Alene

Going into the race, the goal was to either break 10 hours or sneak in and a get Kona slot…or both! It became apparent once I saw the list of names racing and the size of the 40-44 men’s field that a Kona slot was not likely, so I focused on breaking 10 hours. In the days leading up to the race, I was yet again suffering from nausea, a new pre-race phenomena for me this year, but I managed to take it all in stride. Physically, I felt great everyday during the taper, and at times, I thought maybe too great. I actually like my body to feel a bit tired, like a couple of days after a good training day (foreshadowing). Socially, race week was simply awesome. I got to finally meet Michelle and Matt, hang out with Teresa and Mark some more, and I had a lot of teammates and friends from home doing the race. Spending time with good people is the other draw of the ironman experience. Onto the race:

The swim: 58:06
I lined myself far left in the front with a straight shot to the first buoy. I was prepared to battle as this was probably the ideal position for the shortest line. The cannon went off and I was surprised at how quickly I found clean water. Within 100 yards, I had nobody in front or on either side of me. But once we reached the first buoy, everybody converged and things got a bit busy, but never bad. Throughout the swim, I knew I was having a good swim instead of a great swim. A great swim (54 min) feels like my heart is about to pop out of my chest, but yet I can maintain. I weighed the factors and I decided that it wasn’t worth the increased heart rate for a 2-minute time gain, unbeknownst that it would actually be a 4-minute time gain. I was a bit disappointed in the time, but knew I was still pretty high up in the field. Unlike many people, the cold was not an issue, must be from all those years of racing Escape from Alcatraz.

The bike: 5:53:56
I took the first lap out very controlled and focused on my nutrition: about 100 calories every 20 minutes, sip of fluid every 10 minutes, and a salt tablet every 35 minutes. The plan was to split the first lap in a 2:45-2:50 and pick it up a bit in the second lap for 5:30 bike split. In order to go under 10 hours, I had no choice but to split 5:30 or faster. I started to feel a bit fatigued just before the end of the first loop, but you always have a low point during an ironman, and then you come back to life. Thus, I just kept calm, carried on, and I waited to come back to life. I went through the first loop in 2:48 and thought, I’m still on pace. But I never came back to life, and I just kept getting more fatigued until I bonked. It was during this time that I felt like I was just plain out of shape, sort of like when I do my first long ride of the season. So many times, I fought to get back into the race. When Michelle went by me, I set a goal to stay with her until the end of the ride. All I can say is that on this day, I learned that even though the mind is willing, the body can’t respond. My mind was so willing but my legs burned so bad and had nothing. It was at this time that I let go of breaking 10-hours and focused on getting back to T2; and in the process, find the joy in this ironman as though it was my first.

The run: 4:20:34
As I was approaching T2, I decided that I would at least salvage this race and try to PR my ironman run split. I felt great starting the run, my turnover was quick, and I was in really good spirits. Nobody passed me the first 11 miles and I played the game, how many runners can you pick off. I started to get tired at about the 12-mile mark but soon saw Michelle up the road. I set a goal to run up to her and if I got tired, we could help each other through the second loop. But it took me another one or so mile to even catch up to her, she picked up her pace! Once I got up to her, I felt good so I continued my pace and passed her. But as soon as I made the pass, a wave of bonk came over me. I hit the aid station and had to walk, and slowly, things deteriorated. From mile 18 on, once again, the mind was willing but the body would not respond. I would will myself to run but the body couldn’t do it. For the next 5 miles, it was mostly walk with attempts at shuffling, and eating everything in sight: pretzels, orange slices, and chicken broth. Finally, the nutrition kicked in and with it my spirit and the drive to run the last two miles. And oh the finish, did I milk that finish. I was waving my arms, taking bows, kissing my biceps (a little trick I learned from my new friend Hank), and pumping up the crowd. I found the joy in ironman racing as though it was my first. When I crossed the line, I wanted to turn around, run back out, and do it all one more time.

The result: 11:19:40 [362nd overall; 73rd age-group]
This FB update from my friend Mark expresses my sentiment quite well: “Ironman CDA yesterday was not my best day for 140.6 BUT I got er' done. There are some days you just have to finish what you start. Yesterday was one of those days! :). Onward...” And remember the foreshadowing part? My gut instinct tells me the reason I felt great during the taper was because I was just plain out of shape. I know myself and I know that I lose my fitness real quickly, thus, I don’t usually rest that much during a taper. But I also wanted to try and see if resting a lot more would work because statistically, most triathletes go into races too tired and not rested enough. At least now, I know with confidence exactly what works for me.

A Tale of Two..Uh, Seven Ironmans

My first was Vineman in 1999, where I suffered two flats and spent an hour on the road waiting for support. The second was IM France where my buddy and I did not do our homework and flew in five days before the race, not enough time to shake the jetlag. The result was a DNF for both of us. The third was IM CDA and a disappointing 4:40 run split. The fourth was IM CDA part deux where I decided to take a nap under a tree in the 90° heat, and awoke in an ambulance ride to the med tent. The fifth was IM OZ last year where I finished with a PR of 10:27, but still far from a good race. I got a bit excited exiting the water with the second pack of pro's and somehow thought I could ride with them for the first 40K. Th result was a blow up and a 3:58 run split. The sixth was Vineman again last year and after a 56 swim, 5:22 bike, I blew up on the run once again.

I haven't had too much luck at the IM distance and this weighs heavy on my psyche. Also, apparently pre-race prep involves nausea this year, something totally new to me. I am positive it is nerves, but from everything I've learned, this is fairly common with people, just new to me. But this week has been absolutely awesome: feeling good, feeling fit, and spending time with some good people.

The best remedy for a shaky psyche is support from your friends. All this week, I've received some amazing messages from friends and with each message, my psyche gains stability. I want to thank you all for taking the time to shoot me a quick message, I store your words to recall them on race day. I have every intention of being a game-day'er tomorrow, and to bring it when it counts...on race day. Besides racing tough as nails, I also plan to smile, acknowledge some spectators for their cheers, thank some volunteers, and support my fellow racers. Let's rock and roll!

15 Hours to Fulfill A Goal

Yesterday, I drove 15 hours in hopes of fulfilling a goal. By 10 PM, I hit my breaking point and called it a day, just a little over one hour shy of Coeur d'Alene. This morning I arrived to CDA amidst a thunderstorm and showers, and a much anticipated ride with Michelle, Teresa, and Matt was delayed. By 11 AM, Matt and I were able to ride 2+ hours, and the sun and warmer weather eventually greeted us. Then it was off to check-in and I run into the awesome Sue Hutter, looking way cool jetting around town on her scooter. After check-in, I went for my 30-40 minute run with some pick-ups. If only 6:40 miles would feel as easy on Sunday as they did today. Good stuff.

And then I got back to my hotel room to a barrage of text and FB messages. I got the sense that a lot of people were thinking about me today, and I definitely felt the love. This "thoughtfulness" is so unique to ironman. I was riding with Matt today and I told him, I feel like I'm carrying each of my supporters with me on this ride, I feel their presence. Today was a full day and even after 15 hours of driving yesterday, I felt like I had more than enough energy to attack the day. Thanks for the energy my friends. It was a great start to this ironman adventure. Some pics to better tell the story:

Benchmarks

We all have benchmarks that give us feedback about our fitness. With three weeks remaining until IM CDA, my benchmarks lead me to believe I am fit and ready to race. Today's 2-hour run felt speedy, effortless both physically and mentally, and I maintained a 7:15 pace for 16.60 somewhat hilly miles. Yesterday's straight 3200 swim, descending 800's, felt best the last 1600. This past Saturday's 4-hour ride on the trainer ("turbo" for all you Aussies/Kiwis) was mentally easy and went by in a flash, even the 1-hour at IM effort/cadence. The 9-mile run off that ride was equally effortless. I am in good spirits.

I told Charisa this past weekend that I wished IM CDA was this coming weekend. I made this comment mostly out of fear, fear that I would screw things up in the three weeks of waiting for the race to come. If anything, I need these three weeks to do some increased intensity and to taper. I know I won't screw up but if I were to screw up, here's how:

My OCD mind thinks I need to keep up the volume and train more to keep my fitness. But my body needs something completely different. My body needs less volume, more intensity, and proper recovery. I need to shut my mind down and just listen to my body. It's important to plan at this time, to avoid those "extra" or "padded" miles just to appease the nervous mind.

And speaking of Charisa, here is a comment I left on her blog: So proud of you, looking at you on the stage with all those big names, in a race format that doesn't necessarily play to your strengths, I am inspired...as always. Good stuff Charisa! This girl just keeps getting faster and faster.

Quietly Doing My Homework

I realized that I haven't posted since last Monday, and this post is a bit contrived for the sake of posting. I'm just quietly doing my homework in preparation for IM CDA. I have both a plan and a philosophy for the remaining four weeks until the big day. I have a training skeleton that I will follow, but at the same time, will be flexible with proper recovery taking precedence. I am following Macca's tip to pick the one workout you need to nail for the day, and the rest of the workouts for the day are amenable depending on recovery. I am also working on rebuilding my confidence. Last summer, before racing the full Vineman, I had no doubt about my ability to go under 10 hours, I believed 100% that I could do it. My confidence is a bit shaky this time around. There is no way I'll break 10 hours if I don't BELIEVE I can do it. The first step in rebuilding my confidence is to start nailing my key workouts. The more key workouts I nail, the more I deposit into the confidence bank. I made some good deposits this past weekend, and this coming weekend will give me lots more opportunities to make deposits, about 20 hours of swim, bike, run deposits. When I think of all the work I have to do this weekend, I'm reminded of the the times that I've been able to sit quietly at the SFMOMA enjoying my favorite piece of artwork. The picture does not do this Rothko justice, put it on your bucket list to sit in front of this painting one day.