Test Taking

You have no doubt heard of the term nervous nelly, but I want to introduce you to negative nelly, the alter ego I took on today during my ride. After an awesome swim workout with my team, probably my best of the season, I was at lost as to why negative thoughts kept creeping in my head during the ride.

I'm training too much. I'm training too little. Oh hell, I have no idea what I'm doing.
I'm not doing enough speed work.
I'm not cut out for the ironman distance, there's no way I can go under 10 hours. I'm backing out of IM CDA and IM Canada.

It's been a frustrating start to the season. It's like I'm doing all of the homework but still failing the test. I'm actually not that surprised. I graduated high school with a 4.3 GPA but if you looked solely at my SAT score, you'd think that I spent my entire time in high school cutting classes and smoking behind the gym. And then there were my friends who never did their homework, and they aced the SAT. I used to half-jokingly say, "I'm not smart, I just work really hard." It appears I'm reliving high school all over again.